THE GREAT MUCKY MUCK was circling the drain,

How could this happen with his Great Genius Brain?

How could this be, how COULD he be caught?

This just should not happen, it should not, Not, NOT, NOT!!!

More charges, indictments, indictments, more charges,

Like a river jammed up with barges and barges

Filled with Grand Juries and lawyers and judges,

Carrying animus, carrying grudges

All against the poor Muck, why, what did he do?

An innocent Muck, like me and like you.

So he bent a few laws, so he lied and he cheated,

So he raped and assaulted all the women he meeted.

So he started a riot and attempted a coup,

When you lose an election, what else can you do?

So he hid Top, Top Secrets and bragged all about it,

So he scammed fake electors and election laws flouted,

So he conspired and committed sedition,

And sent all his ‘friends’ straight into perdition

So he betrayed his country, these are just little things,

When you’re the Great Mucky Muck, when you’re really a king–

The Count of Corruption, the Sultan of Scandal,

The Marquee of Malfeasance, the nation’s Top Vandal

The Esquire of Slime, the Duke of Deception,

A liar and cheat since your very conception.

So… we surely can’t blame him, not really, at all.

But hell, we can cheer…

Every inch of his fall.